Gaia Community: Teenie~Dakini's Blog

~

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 21:29:52 GMT

swimming in a sea of non-normalcy,
surrounded by dis (-function, -ease,-missives)...
salvation comes in the form of creation,
no matter how small,
some beauty, some love, some joy, some wonder,
some... thing,
from the heart, spirit, soul.

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An American Prayer -

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 19:36:40 GMT

American Prayer - Dave Stewart (Barack Obama Music Video)

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OB BI Won ~2008

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 22:54:32 GMT

! empowering !

the force is strong with this one: OB BI Won ~2008

...

OB(ama) BI (den) Won,
Cain No BE ~2008

:-))))

and thanks to Zazzle, I've got my custom tee on its way...

iN jOy!
~s

ps..... America needs YOU, thinking & taking action!

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What is the most constant ritual in your life?

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 15:26:29 GMT

returning to ~ L O V E ~

which is everpresent, already there, lifting the veil, an on-going reminding, enheartening, enlighten and enlivening. a constant course correction after stumbling, forgeting, grand slams of 'im in control'....

a re-attunement to LOVE
a refinement of LOVE
its expression
and call to action

L O V E through the ages.... its subleties, complexities, entanglements and liberation...
its utmost simplicity....
the weave, the web, the flavors of Love... Lovelihood.... " I loved, therefore I lived"

you know ;-)
~ L O V E ~

In jOy!

U2 - Love Rescue Me (Lovetown Sydney '89)

U2 - ONE

Tags: QaR, ritual, habit, gift, day

. s o l o .

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 22:05:27 GMT

today i weep
i scream, "damn you!"
breathe breathe
growl...

i feel the burden of my heritage
the curse and kinks
constraints
as i birth myself
. s o l o .

i feel the intense push
after a long strenuous labor
i cry "i can't do this"
"i want out"
"damn you for getting me into this mess"

i feel alone
(although i'm not)
alone in this labor
that takes me to the brink

the altar of totality and nothingness
breaking open
breaking through
being between

labor of fire and fear
shifts to
water and letting go
contract/expand
i'm grinding gears

this bond i have with my body
is it bondage and betrayal,
as i suffer in pain
or is it treasure, a temple
and i trust its gifts

nevertheless i weep
and scream
fall in between
forgetful closure
and pristine awakening

damn you!
divine you~

alone in the moment that
encompasses it all

Tags: transformation, development, self, spirit, soul, suffering, shadow, fear, letting go, life

Burn Baby Burn: Pele's Pyre of ~F I R E

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 18:56:26 GMT

i'm burning here
wound up, anxious, weepy, skin crawling
i'm not going anywhere
i'm standing right here,
on the edge
the pyre of fire

disrobing, shedding, exposing
b a r e
what else can i rip off? rip open?
i want full exposure
wiggle, s t r e t c h, moan
every nook and cranny to this heat, fire, light
burn baby burn
an impulse: to scream, run, hide, take cover
but there's no turning back

the burn has begun, stop now and i'll be
an ugly deformed wretch, raw, oozing
no no, blackened is the aim
scorch the fields,
and in weeks or months to come
the grounds blackened
c h a r n e l
will have been nourished by the old remnants
recycled into new life, potentialities
r e b i r t h

i'm letting go, releasing,
the really really good
in order to play great
!MAHA!
cleaning heart like cleaning house
and i'm burning

i've practiced
staying engaged
and letting go
but this,
this is a new level
releasing the certainty of good, really good
for the uncertainty of great
the audacity of !great!

this is big biG bIG BIG
competing conflicts
maternally "hold on"
paternally "take it"
fear fear fear
breaking long lineages
too much breast, not enough balls
fear fear fear
i'm suffocating, cant breathe
a n x i e t y

p e l e, baby... take it from here
i'm yours
on the pyre
passionately partnered
offerer ~ offered to
ignore my squirms, screams, self
i~ w a n t ~ this
every last bit of it
immaculate burning
p e l e
please

=========================
home in the ashes
;-)
~s

Tags: meditation, practice, embodiment, goddess, purification, mahamudra, tantra, feminine, empowerment

How would you respond to those who feel overwhelmed by bad news?

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 15:40:21 GMT

i'm here. i love you.

<<<<<HUG>>>>>

:whats up darling?:

presence.

...

is there anything i can do to help?

...

presence.

:you'll get through this. you'll be ok. :

<<<<<HUG>>>>>

i'm here. i love you.

Tags: QaR, news, problems, world, change, hope, life

~ IF

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 15:14:08 GMT

who would i be
if i did not hide

what would i do
if i did not doubt

how would i act
if i did not hesitate

who would i love
if i did not judge

what would i see
if i did not turn away

what would i say
if this minute was the last

what change would i make
if the cost was my life

how would i sleep
if i felt the world

....

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Humming Strumming

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 18:03:12 GMT

ooo delish.... toes to tips, humming strumming...
loooong kundalini strings resounding: mmm, ohhh, ommm, ahhh, eee,
no where else i want to be
here now
all of me
with all of thee
we
pulsing playing
d i v i n i t y

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go ahead and ask....

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Thu, 22 May 2008 02:48:24 GMT

"stace whatcha doing?"

====> whatever i want to!!! :-)

i am in a state sans kids! and it is beautifully blissfull.... capital B-L-I-S-S-F-U-L-L !!
(yes, i mean full... as in over- freely -flowing)
oh my! hallefrigginlujah!

i love them, i do, i do! and i miss them, a little.

and...
i can breathe, whew!
i can re-collect myself....

my awareness, all of it, is just *right here*...
with me, now, and only.

i don't have to be attuned to the state of silence or noise.... if its too quiet, they are up to something. scanning, what are those noises? is that healthy play? is there trouble? is it a dynamic, escalating? will i need to intervene soon to guide them through communication, understanding and cooperation? is that a sound of danger?

i don't have to be prepared that one of my daughters could wake in the middle of the night with a frightful dream... and settle her back down again.

my activities can be as LOUD as i want. i can LEAVE the house spur of the moment, any time of night, for whatever strikes my whim. i can take a midnight walk under the stars hearing all the wild noises of life after dark... ha! i can!

simply, my attention, awareness, mindfulness isn't dispersed.... it doesn't have to go in the direction of my two dearest most precious beings and keeping them in good care.... which is an honor, my privilege, and taxing.

its *right here* for me, solamente.
and its this moment, that i realize intimately how much i have, to offer and to give....
because dispersion has been replaced with intensity

focused, flowing...
shazam!
::: molten mama turns volcanic vixen with lava loving :::

so what am i about to do? i don't know, it doesn't matter.... i just can.

;=D

Tags: motherhood, mindfulness, awareness, care, parenting, energy, rejuvenation

The Haunting

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Sun, 18 May 2008 07:36:23 GMT

im being haunted
haunted by you
drawn
drawn like the moth to the flame
compelled hooked ensnared

it doesnt feel good
this force within
nonresponsive to my control

its an illusion
a trick, afterall
you're a stranger
a source of torment
theres no reason for this pull

what is it that im wanting
what am i pretending to see
in you
that i need to see in me?

is it because you are unknown
easy to create
a deep desire to investigate
who are you? what are you like?
weaving a web of story

why am i obsessing, wanting more,
to dig, excavate, explore

starving, craving, hunger not ignored
demanding, looming
this won't be denied

what is this?
this beast in me? what do you want?
how can i help you?
because i want you
i want you gone!

....

(to be continued...)
photo by ken refsgaard

Tags: shadow, practice, compulsion, lesson, awareness, suffering

b l i n k / b l i n k

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Sat, 17 May 2008 00:52:25 GMT

ahhhh
relax
breathe in, breathe out
blink open, blink closed
sitting in my bath

long-legged
ankles crossed
hands in prayer
resting floating
unwinding
releasing

i blink my eyes
closed
my wings grow
ivory luminescent
stronger, fuller
expanding
feeling their power
to lift and carry me
the impossible is possible
invincible
compassion & wisdom
flutters, swoooosh
steady, deep empowered waves
aloft
heart has risen emboldened
without question
crystal clarity adorning my power

"boo"

eyes blink open
startled
im in my bath
smiling down at me
my daughter
swirling her hands in the bubbles

i gesture a "shoo"
and off she trots
quiet returns

i blink my eyes
closed
my legs transform
a mermaid tail
of peacock coloring
long
a unified whole
hips to tips

flowing full flexible
body sensing bare
naked vibrancy within the waters

translucent sparkles
of sun touching drops
swimming gliding diving
a new world inviting

courage curiosity communion
strands of strength
nestled within
a treasure,
once abandoned
now reclaimed
embedded in my beings bosom

"mommm-MY"

eyes blink open
sense scan audit
surroundings ok

"mommy, sister is pesting me"
enters from the other room
punctuating the silence
of my sanctuary

"ill be right there"
i sing above the hum

blink, blink
eyes open, eyes close

thinly veiled in/betweens
waking dreaming
dreaming waking

tenuous separation of these worlds
blink, blink
neighbors behind/ before a shade
a shade of enlightened dark
a shade of darkened light

blink / blink

Tags: meditation, waking, dreaming

LIVESTRONG DAY 5.13.08

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 16 May 2008 02:17:54 GMT

Tags: cancer awareness, lance armstrong, livestrong day, livestrong army, fun run, race

Haiku for You!

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Sun, 11 May 2008 18:14:39 GMT

You are the best no matter how old

I love you more than anything

combined I love you so much, sooooooooo much!

+

You are so pretty,
You are so kind,
You are so sweet,
so nice,
so lovable too!

(from: a child to a mother .... a 9/7/9 Haiku + postscript )

Tags: QaR, mothers, motherhood, learning, inspiration

m a g d a l e n a ...

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Sat, 10 May 2008 20:38:44 GMT

....

and what did you do
you felt backed in a corner
again shouting
"you are so selfish"
over and over,
the mantra of my childhood

crushing mantra, booming in my ears
you had no idea what you were asking of me
the integrity of love that i felt
and would have to offer
would want to offer

....

i love you
i need you
i want you
why weren't we enough?

....

its not my fault
i was full of love for you
your wound blocked its acceptance
rejected love
you passed it on... your wound

i fought. this won't take me out.
over and over....
my sanctuary, my resurrection
time and time again
from the edge
was the arms wide open
head to the heavens
feel the Love
not the nails in the body
its for the best of the whole
wider, open open open
embrace it all
embody
embody
embody
LOVE

offer it

unconditionally

the pain will stop.

it did.
a practice became habit
wider, deeper, endless

it worked.
with a cost, a high cost
i sacrificed my self
each time
laid out on that cross
enveloped in that expanse
embracing the greater Love

i knew all about you
your needs, hurts, wants, quirks
but mine
disappeared
in the clouds above
my head as i turned to the heavens
offering it all
for the benefit of us
as a family

....

WE LOVED YOU!

i love you
i understand
you did your best
my suffering has turned
into grace
thankfully

now i reclaim that self
the clouds are still above
and of water
she is raining on me
returning to her home
becoming to know her
each drop
each world

i welcome me home

Tags: healing, Love, childhood coping, forgiveness, compassion, understanding, acceptance, resilience, gift, pain, offering

I'm Just a Girl (Power to the Meek)

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Sat, 10 May 2008 17:57:16 GMT

Im just a girl
With my head screwed on
Im just a girl
With a smoking gun

I got my fingers stung
My fingers stung yeah
Im just a girl
With my fingers stung

Bless these bones
Bless this skin
All of me
And the mess Im in

Yea the mess Im in
But I dont care
Dont know where Ive been
But Ill get me there

Im alive
Yea and its alright
Im alive
Yea and its alright

Power to the meek
Power to speak
I got the power
Within me
Yea yea

Power to the shine
In my worn out shoes
Power to me
Power to you

Bless this head
Bless this hair
Bless me to the dirt
In my fingernails yea

Bless this day
Bless this night
Give me something good
Make me feel alright

Im alive
Yea and its alright
Im alive
Yea and its alright

Im alive
Yea and its alright
Im alive
Yea and its alright
Its alright

Power to the meek
Power to speak
I got the power
Within me
Power to the shine
In my worn out shoes
Yea
Power to me
Power to you

~Eurythmics, "Power to the Meek"

Eurythmics 2000 Live By Request 16 - Power To The Meek

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Hopes, Prayers and Healing Energy

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 23:44:57 GMT

:::On behalf of a dear colleague and his daughter::: ~ Stacy

RE: We welcome your hopes, prayers & healing energy

Dear Friends –

Yesterday, my daughter Kaylee was involved in a serious vehicle accident and is now in serious condition at Baylor Hospital in Dallas. She’s suffered a severe head injury, and after successful initial surgery to repair vascular issues, we pray, hope and radiate healing energy for even the most foundational consciousness to return. We wait with our hearts balanced delicately on a razor’s edge.

So please take just a moment to hold Kaylee in your hearts – hold her dearly, hold her well.

With my deepest appreciation and love,

- Michael

Tags: prayers, healing, urgent, accident, coma, friends

~the field is ablaze with bloom~

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 00:24:17 GMT

.

and yet.... i want to sing! celebrate! the fire is blazing
and you, with you, through you
a spark

did you know?

can you enjoy this unfolding.... amusing, adoring, receiving and releasing
yes?
yes.

the fields were burned, blackened, ashen
it was barren, untended, dreary
many a sattva lent a hand
cleared the space
tending waiting seeding

and wonder, oh wonderously
unexpectedly
a piercing peculiar pollination
unintended? intended?
no matter,
it amassed, secretly , quietly underground
a stirring, a stretching
a breaking through
a bud catching the warmth of light
and day by day buds bursting
up, through, out

the field is ablaze with bloom!~

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i do i do i do!

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 00:19:52 GMT

i need time....
i'm familiar with the constraints, restraints,
permissions and omissions
demands and expectations
dis-ing and dumping
until i begin to believe

i want time....
for my liberation
how far can i go
what will happen
most importantly i will know

not to say that i don't want to hear your voice
i do i do i do!
not to say i don't want to be in your field
i do i do i do!
to have coffee, take a walk, see
i do i do i do!

and its risky. i'd be a liability
liberated? yes
literate, through and through?
no.

;-)

Tags: love, new, unfolding, liberation, past, romance, time

Pimping for Darfur

http://teeniedakini.gaia.com — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 21:59:48 GMT

Tags: crisis, genocide, darfur, action, donation, awareness, change, humanity, human rights