i'm burning here
wound up, anxious, weepy, skin crawling
i'm not going anywhere
i'm standing right here,
on the edge
the pyre of fire
disrobing, shedding, exposing
b a r e
what else can i rip off? rip open?
i want full exposure
wiggle, s t r e t c h, moan
every nook and cranny to this heat, fire, light
burn baby burn
an impulse: to scream, run, hide, take cover
but there's no turning back
the burn has begun, stop now and i'll be
an ugly deformed wretch, raw, oozing
no no, blackened is the aim
scorch the fields,
and in weeks or months to come
the grounds blackened
c h a r n e l
will have been nourished by the old remnants
recycled into new life, potentialities
r e b i r t h
i'm letting go, releasing,
the really really good
in order to play great
!MAHA!
cleaning heart like cleaning house
and i'm burning
i've practiced
staying engaged
and letting go
but this,
this is a new level
releasing the certainty of good, really good
for the uncertainty of great
the audacity of !great!
this is big biG bIG BIG
competing conflicts
maternally "hold on"
paternally "take it"
fear fear fear
breaking long lineages
too much breast, not enough balls
fear fear fear
i'm suffocating, cant breathe
a n x i e t y
p e l e, baby... take it from here
i'm yours
on the pyre
passionately partnered
offerer ~ offered to
ignore my squirms, screams, self
i~ w a n t ~ this
every last bit of it
immaculate burning
p e l e
please
=========================
home in the ashes
;-)
~s
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November 2008 (1)
Teenie~Dakini
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